About me, beyond AS

Figure I should do an 'about me' post-- after all, there's more to my life than Asperger's (I think).

My favourite Star Trek movie is IV, for the whales. I was big into marine mammals before I became a Trekkie (which I now am in earnest). No, I don't speak Klingon, but I do try to insert what words and phrases I know in Vulcan into my everyday thought/speech patterns. My favourite character is Spock, because I identify with him. My second favourite character is Sulu, because he's awesome-- fencing, piloting, being cute. Plus, love George Takei's voice.

My favourite book is 'Good Omens' by Neil Gaimean (I'm going to meet him on October third at a book signing!) and Terry Pratchett.

My favourite playwright is Oscar Wilde. Actually, Oscar is my favourite everything. Just as a person I adore him and try to live my life in an Oscar-ish fashion. Even got a green carnation to pin to my velvet blazer.

My favourite poem is Kipling's 'The Thousandth Man', and I reccomend it to anyone who's never Kippled. (love that joke)

I listen to a broad range of music. I love showtunes, rock and roll, even opera.

On TV, I watch(in alphabetical order so I don't have to pick favourites): Colbert Report, Daily Show, House, Hustle, Jeapordy!, Monk, NUMB3RS, Psych, Robot Chicken, Star Trek 2.0, X-Play, and others, but this list is getting long. I would watch 'Bones' but am in class when it comes on.

I adore anime. In fact, I adore all things Japanese (although I'm allergic to most seafood, so I have limited options when making sushi!), both pop culture and historical culture.

I identify strongly with my Scottish heritage.

I'm a mimic-- to make up for the lack of my own, since childhood I have been able to effectively mimic the speech patterns, postures, facial expressions, and tics of others. I spent large portions of my childhood 'being' the Marx Brothers. Even though vocally I don't 'sound like anyone', because of my timing and emphasis, I still get complimented on my imitations. I'm best at Christopher Walken, George Takei, Alan Rickman, and Groucho Marx-- which aren't terribly hard impressions to do, because they're all very distinctive, but you have to keep in mind that I'm doing it all with what is a rather girly voice. I also 'become' other people throughout the course of the day, but that's a coping mechanism-- it's easier to adapt a persona sometimes than to always have to be me. Sometimes I'm a real person, or a character, or an actor, or just something other than me.

I'm a female drag queen-- that's the best way of putting it. For some reason I emphasize a whole lot with drag queens (really anyone who's not in the 'straight' part of the sexual spectrum) because the girl me is someone I 'put on' for special occasions-- I rarely wear makeup when I'm not onstage, for starters. And I have that outsider perspective, and that feeling that who I am isn't quite who I am, or that I have a part of me that usually gets sublimated because it's too different. So even though I'm female and I prefer men, I tend to self-identify as 'gay'.

I like boys who like boys.

Oh-- and I'm 21, live at home, play video games with my aspie brother (our dad also has AS, but our sister is neurotypical (what you'd call 'normal'), as is our mom. My mom's a school psychologist, actually, and it was through her work that she read about AS and came home saying 'I think I know what you guys have'. And sho 'nuff and yes we do.

A quick introduction, before I die for the night.

Or sleep. But hey, who are you to quibble?

I'm starting this blog because I feel called to the task of letting people know what Asperger's Syndrome is, and what it is like to have it.

~Asperger's Syndrome is on the Autism spectrum, but a few key differences seperate it from high-functioning autism. For starters:

~~Language development. While language development comes late in even the higher-functioning autism cases, it comes early in Asperger's Syndrome.

I'll have more distinctions between the two as time rolls on, I'm sure, but maybe you aren't all that familiar with high-functioning autism either. If your only knowledge of autism comes from watching 'Rainman', then... well, maybe you've been living in a cave. On Mars. With your fingers in your ears. Anyway, as I mentioned before, it's a spectrum-- that means there's a whole range of severity, and different symptoms that not all people will have in common. So, here are some basic distinguishing factors of Asperger's Syndrome for the uninitiated:

~Overly pedantic speech. For instance, using the word 'pedantic'-- or, as I did when I was a child, 'pinnipeds' (Pinnipeds are seals and sea lions). Speaking in a stiff, formal fashion, instead of 'naturally'.

~Not understanding the 'unwritten rules' of social behaviour. We're not trying to be difficult-- these things that 'everyone knows' were never programmed into our brains. It makes it very difficult to make friends, and growing up can be terribly awkward when you don't get what everyone else does.

~Inability to read cues in tone or body language. While I learned to read non-verbalized cues, it was learning, the way other people learn maths. I studied drama (which is a highly reccomended strategy), because learning to act taught me to act human. Before that, I would often give people the wrong message because I did not know what my own body language was saying to them. ('Stay away', in case you were curious)

~Hypersensitivity. This can be one sense, or all of them, and it's a blessing and a curse. Yes, sometimes having the best eyes or ears in the room can come in handy, but try concentrating in a classroom when you can hear every whisper behind the teacher's back, when slight shifts in sunlight out of the corner of your eye grab your attention and hold it. When you can smell everyone around you, or feel things you aren't supposed to. Tactile hypersensitivity can lead you to believe you're ill because you feel your body doing what it's supposed to, more acutely than others can. And having too much of any sense can make you (or others) believe you're a little bit crazy.

~Avoidance of eye contact. It's uncomfortable. And sometimes we stare, and we don't mean to, so it's best to avoid it altogether. People think we're aloof or rude because of a lot of these things, but we aren't-- we want to make, have, and be friends, too. Being afraid to look at people is just one of the things that makes it harder. (Note: In Japan, where prolonged eye contact is considered rude, other signs of Asperger's Syndrome also go unnoticed as a problem-- Is your kid quiet? Enjoys learning? Really, really likes trains? Well, why can't the others be more like that?) (Trains are a common fixation among people with AS)

~Obsessions/compulsions. A big part of AS (getting tired of typing it out each time) is something very like OCD. In fact, when little was known about AS (and most of what was known was outside the US), I and many other aspies (people with AS-- it's an affectionate term. I'm going to use it, so you might as well know it) were diagnosed with OCD instead.

~Fixations. The objects of some of our OCD behaviour. Aspies tend to get stuck on things that resonate with them. Often it's something mechanical that can be taken apart and learned that way. I mentioned trains earlier. Dinosaurs are on the list. For me, and a few others, it was whales and other marine mammals. Anime and science fiction hold our hearts as well-- maybe because we can often find something to identify with there. I'll write about my aspie connection with both in later posts, because there's too much to cover here. Anyway, when we like something, we'll talk about it. And we won't always be able to judge when other people are tired of listening-- after all, our hobbies are so fascinating! Why wouldn't you want to know all about how they work, in minute detail no layman should be expected to understand? For all the times I've put someone through that, I'm just going to apologize right now.

~Literal translations. If you ask 'what's up?', the answer is 'the sky'. If you ask 'what brings you here?', the answer is 'a car'. And if you ask 'do you hear voices', the answer is 'yes'. Doesn't everybody? This tendency to take everything literally leads to people with AS being labelled schizophrenic. It also makes it hard to fill out surveys in doctors' offices... And when you give answers like 'the sky' and 'a car', people tend to think you're being a smart alec, and they don't fill you in on what it is everyone else knows that you don't.

There's more, of course-- there's always more-- but it's late-- rather, it's early, and I need sleep. So this is me, Anne Marsh, saying goodnight.

Goodnight.

=^_^=

Anne (and her customary cat-face)